Dear back fat love handles and fat jiggles......You are requested to vacate my body ASAP>>>I wish it was that easy..... But because I have a love for the sweet indulgence of life chocolate, Beer, Wine and Junk T.V. and I really hate working out these days I find things are just getting more of a jiggle. I of course have all the excuses #1 I am tired #2 I am relaxing #3 My Head Hurts #4 Theres something good on T.V. #5 I had a beer already #6 I ll do it tomorrow #7 My Kids need me #8 I ate too much #9 the stroller is to heavy to pull #10 the Dog runs too fast #11 Its too hard #12 I don't want too #13 Id rather be on the computer #14 I need to call someone #15 I don't have anyone to go with......and so on and so on.
I have a gym membership, I use to run and I use to be pretty fit, its not like I don't have some reasons not too. I guess thinking running around after 3 snot ridden toddlers during the day and being dragged by the dog at night is a work out, isn't cutting it. So I finally went and I start the trip off with thinking in the car on the way of what I am going to do while there, first I am going to do cardio for 45 min, then weights for my arms and then abs and Ill finish with stretching. I arrive and already the feeling hits me (I don't want to go) I start to walk up the stairs to the gym and in my head I think here we go. I walk into the gym and I see buff guys and girls working on their well defined bodies and I immediately look down Yuck rolls here there and hey look I think I see my toes. I don't look up I dont want to see anyone or attract attention. I look left great a whole wall of mirrors and look there is me with my uncontrollable hair squished into a bun, wearing a tight white tank for all the gym to see my pot belly and muffin top and not doing my Lou Lou's and Justice. Look down again I enter the Cardio room face the white sign up board time of reason Okay now 30 min of Cardio, weight, abs, and stretching. I scan the room for the perfect machine and more importantly the perfect spot, definitely not the treadmill in between Mr and Mrs Marathoner, Okay how about the spin bikes humm maybe not beside the Lance Armstrong stand in, Okay the olyptical we there is a nice quiet spot near the fat guy in the corner with my back facing everyone (great now everyone can look at my ass jiggle as I work out) Well at least I get to over look the Mountains as I work it . I get on start my long awaited journey and now I am thinking this isn't so bad, then the incline starts okay its getting harder I am 2 minutes into the second incline and I am planning to only do 15 min of cardio and stretch and screw everything else. Okay Tanya hang in there, I can do this, here we go, lets do it....... 15 min, half way, I think I can actually do this but maybe only 30 min Cardio and some weights.... 20 min in I am dyeing, I need too stop, I cant breath, am I having a heart attack ,no more that's it it over.... 23 min in okay I am okay, this isn't that bad, again maybe just 30 min Cardio and some abs......28 min OMG when will this end!!!!.....30 min Yeah I finished I cant believe it okay I can do everything now weights, Abs ,and stretching. I walk in to the weight room look around sigh look down defiantly just abs. I get to the stretching area, get a mat start my sit ups, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-Oh God-11-12-13-14-15 Oh no-16-17 I am not sure I can do this-18-19-20 Okay that's it i am calling it a day. Its time for a beer and to relax. I leave and get a beer and have a couple, counterproductive probably but I did it! I went to the gym. Okay I thikng I can do 30 min Cardio and 30 min weight training and 10 min abs tomorrow.......or maybee just 3 beers.
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I was thinking of you last night while i was in my "results 321" class. I kept saying to myself F-this!
ReplyDeleteThis is awful. All i could picture was you drinking beer.
However, when she told the class 8 more, i maybe did 3 more and still felt pleased with myself for doing 3 more than i wanted to.